Month: November 2018

I Broke The Tradition

On the journey to becoming a more confident woman, sometimes we have to let go of the traditions from our past.

I learned this many years ago when I was married. It’s always been a tradition to have large meals and invite everyone over for the holiday. Well this particular time it was my turn to carry on the tradition. I had to, right, because that’s what everyone has always done, or did I? Well I followed along with the tradition, but it didn’t turn out quite like I had hoped. You see I had never made a turkey before and this was my chance to show everyone what I was made of. Well needless to say, if I remember correctly we had baked chicken wings that thanksgiving because the turkey never got done. I was trying so hard  to keep the tradition of my family that I was a total wreck and didn’t really enjoy the day at all.

Many times in life we proceed with the traditions of who ever it may be and in the process have our confidence zapped because it doesn’t turn out the way we planned and definitely not the way it’s traditionally done, but so what. It’s at a moment like that when I decided to break the tradition for the sake of my peace and confidence and do what was best for me and my household. I started cooking a regular dinner for holidays and if I did invite people over I only cooked what I knew how to cook well, not according to the holiday or family traditions.

Being or becoming a confident woman we have to know what works for us and have the courage to make adjustments to the things that aren’t working in our lives. Confidence that even if momma and grandma did it, doesn’t mean you have to follow along if it doesn’t work well for you. I heard this story about a lady who always cut the ends off of her ham before cooking it, and her husband asked why she did that. She told him she did it because that’s what her mother did. She asked her mom why she cut the ends off the ham and her mom told her because that’s what her mom did. Her mom was curious so she asked her mom why she cut the ends off of the ham. Her mom told her she cut the ends off the ham because her pot was too small.

When I first heard that story it really got me to thinking. Just because our parents and grandparents have done something, really doesn’t mean it’s right for us to do. Especially when we think we’re doing something out of tradition, when really it may not be a tradition at all. So ladies please spare yourself the stress of trying to keep family traditions especially when it costs you peace and lowers your confidence. With Christmas fast approaching I challenge you to evaluate the things that you do in your life out of tradition that really doesn’t work for you and costs you your peace and confidence and create your own traditions. Traditions that work for you. As always remember you are a Worthy Woman.

You’re Stronger Than You Think

I remember when I first became a single mom. I had no idea how I would handle parenting on my own. After the initial shock, I didn’t think about it much I just did it, by taking just one step at a time. That’s not to say some of the things I had to do weren’t difficult, because they were, but they had to be done.

In life we face many difficult challenges that sometimes seems impossible to get through, but let me encourage you. Whatever you may be facing today, you have what it takes to overcome this challenge. Whether the challenge is big or small, you possess the strength to make it through. You see, when challenges come in life sometimes our first reaction is “I can’t do this” or “how am I going to make it through this”?

Being a woman of faith I’ve learned that I don’t have to face challenges alone and neither do you. You see with God on your side there isn’t anything you can’t do. Sure in beginning the challenge may be tough and you may doubt your strength, but let me tell you, you are stronger than you think! As women(at least some of the women I know) we down play ourselves way too much. You see when God created you, He put within you everything you need to get through the challenges you face in life. Whether the challenge is being a single parent, a failing marriage, your finances, health or even rocky family relationships, you can overcome the challenge. There is a quote that reminds me of this, it says, “You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have”. Think about it like that, being strong is the only choice you have at the moment. Losing and quitting is not an option, besides you are stronger than the struggle anyway. So stand up and stare that challenge in the face and declare “I am strong and I will get through this”!!

I believe in you and as always remember you are a Worthy Woman.