“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”. As a kid and even numerous times as an adult I have heard this saying spoken. When I was a kid I considered this truth, but as I grew older I came to realize that this statement couldn’t be farther from the truth. Words can have the power to make or break a person and unfortunately the latter rings true for many.
So what do you do when those negative words have been embedded in your mind and sometimes you live as though they’re true? How do you overcome it. I’d like to share a few steps that I believe are helpful in overcoming negative words spoken to you or over you.
1. Change your environment- I can not stress enough the importance of a positive environment. If the person who is speaking negative words over you or to you is in your environment often, it may be time to change environments. It’s difficult to heal when the wound is constantly being reopened. As I talked about in my last post it may be difficult to leave friends and relationships that we’ve had for years, but if they’re speaking negative words to you and over you, the relationship probably isn’t fruitful anyway. If the person speaking negative over you is a parent or a spouse, you may think it’s not possible. Though you may not be able to totally get away from them for a parent you can limit your amount of time and number of days in their presence. For both the spouse and the parent pray for God’s direction in the situation for his leading.
2. Find the truth- In my opinion this is one of the best ways to overcome negative words being spoken over you or to you. Find the truth in God’s word. God’s word is true and “He’s the same yesterday, today and forever”(Heb 13:8). As the scripture says “Even when your mother and father forsake you he will hold you close”(Psalm 27:10). Find two or three scriptures to meditate on to renew your mind regarding the words spoken over you. Instead of meditating on the negative words meditate on words that matter and that speak life to you.
3. Know who you are- When you know who you are it’s hard for someone to tell you who you aren’t. I mean if you know without a shadow of a doubt that your name is Stephanie someone can’t come up to you and tell you your name is Sarah. You’re just not going to believe it no matter how many times they say it or how hard they try to persuade you. The same goes for when someone says things to you that are mean and possibly hateful. Knowing or learning who are is a key to getting past such harsh situations. If you are having difficulty with knowing or finding who you are I will talk about this more in depth in a upcoming post. I know sometimes life can make us as women question our identity but it’s time to learn and know who we are.
4. Say something– When you begin to have thoughts about those hurtful words that were spoken to you or over you, you have to say something. Stop dwelling on what they said and speak the truth. For example if that person told you you’re ugly, you declare to yourself how beautiful you are. If they told you you’ll never amount to anything you declare what a success you are and are going to be. Just as their words had the power to try to break you, your words have the power to change the way you feel and think about yourself.
There is a saying that I absolutely love that applies to this exact topic and it says “What you think of me is none of my business”. This is a good quote to adopt in life, and it will help to save you from the worry and stress of what others say or think of you. It’s only their opinion anyway. As I heard on a call recently we need to stop treating opinions as fact. The fact is you are beautiful, worthy and destined to succeed. So forget the opinion of others and walk in the truth!
Remember You Are a Worthy Woman!