Thank You For Being A Great Mom

I know you probably looked at the title and thought, how can you thank me when you don’t even know me. As I sat down to write this week’s post, I thought about all that mother’s do and I thought it was fitting to say thank you. Let’s face it, the job of a mother is not an easy one and sometimes it’s down right difficult, but we take the good with the bad and keep it moving anyhow. Why, because we love our children and know that the sacrifices we make today will someday pay off. They will grow up to be kind, respectful, loving, compassionate and successful young men and women someday. For now they’re still growing and at times they aren’t as appreciative as we’d like them to be.

In case you have children who haven’t told you in a while, thank you, in case your children haven’t yet understood your sacrifice and often forget to say these words, thank you. Thank you for being their cheerleader, nurse, teacher, cook, and banker to name a few. Thank you for the stern talking to you had to recently give your toddler, and for the punishment you had to put your teenager on not so long ago. Though they may not understand now, someday they will and they will thank you too. The discipline, strictness and the way they sometimes call you “meanie” is all worth it. Though sometimes it seems like too much, in the day in age we live in it’s necessary to be strict and to discipline. Even if they don’t see it once they are adults, they are sure to appreciate it when they have children of their own. So don’t be too hard on yourself, keep doing what you’re doing.

When I say thank you I am also speaking to those mother’s who haven’t actually given birth to a child but are constantly nurturing and caring for children as your own. Selflessly giving and caring for children who either don’t have a mother figure in their lives or you are a mother in addition to someones birth mother. How ever you are considered a mother, your love and sacrifice is appreciated by your children more than you know. So thank you, thank you, thank you!!

Enjoy your Mother’s Day and enjoy the children who’s life you make such a difference in. If no one has ever told you, you are a world changer through the children’s lives you’ve touched.

As always Remember You Are a Worthy Woman!!

How To Overcome Negative Words Spoken Over You

“Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me”. As a kid and even numerous times as an adult I have heard this saying spoken. When I was a kid I considered this truth, but as I grew older I came to realize that this statement couldn’t be farther from the truth. Words can have the power to make or break a person and unfortunately the latter rings true for many.

So what do you do when those negative words have been embedded in your mind and sometimes you live as though they’re true? How do you overcome it. I’d like to share a few steps that I believe are helpful in overcoming negative words spoken to you or over you.

1. Change your environment- I can not stress enough the importance of a positive environment. If the person who is speaking negative words over you or to you is in your environment often, it may be time to change environments. It’s difficult to heal when the wound is constantly being reopened. As I talked about in my last post it may be difficult to leave friends and relationships that we’ve had for years, but if they’re speaking negative words to you and over you, the relationship probably isn’t fruitful anyway. If the person speaking negative over you is a parent or a spouse, you may think it’s not possible. Though you may not be able to totally get away from them for a parent you can limit your amount of time and number of days in their presence. For both the spouse and the parent pray for God’s direction in the situation for his leading.

2. Find the truth- In my opinion this is one of the best ways to overcome negative words being spoken over you or to you. Find the truth in God’s word. God’s word is true and “He’s the same yesterday, today and forever”(Heb 13:8). As the scripture says “Even when your mother and father forsake you he will hold you close”(Psalm 27:10). Find two or three scriptures to meditate on to renew your mind regarding the words spoken over you. Instead of meditating on the negative words meditate on words that matter and that speak life to you.

3. Know who you are- When you know who you are it’s hard for someone to tell you who you aren’t. I mean if you know without a shadow of a doubt that your name is Stephanie someone can’t come up to you and tell you your name is Sarah. You’re just not going to believe it no matter how many times they say it or how hard they try to persuade you. The same goes for when someone says things to you that are mean and possibly hateful. Knowing or learning who are is a key to getting past such harsh situations. If you are having difficulty with knowing or finding who you are I will talk about this more in depth in a upcoming post. I know sometimes life can make us as women question our identity but it’s time to learn and know who we are.

4. Say something– When you begin to have thoughts about those hurtful words that were spoken to you or over you, you have to say something. Stop dwelling on what they said and speak the truth. For example if that person told you you’re ugly, you declare to yourself how beautiful you are. If they told you you’ll never amount to anything you declare what a success you are and are going to be. Just as their words had the power to try to break you, your words have the power to change the way you feel and think about yourself.

There is a saying that I absolutely love that applies to this exact topic and it says “What you think of me is none of my business”. This is a good quote to adopt in life, and it will help to save you from the worry and stress of what others say or think of you. It’s only their opinion anyway. As I heard on a call recently we need to stop treating opinions as fact. The fact is you are beautiful, worthy and destined to succeed. So forget the opinion of others and walk in the truth!

Remember You Are a Worthy Woman!

Are You Satisfied With Your Average?

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Jim Rohn.

If that statement reads true, then would you be satisfied with your average?

I have learned the importance of spending time with the right people. It can really have a significant impact on your life, and can be the difference between success and failure. Maybe you have been friends with someone since you were kids and you used to have so much in common, but as you grew older things began to change. Really you began to change, you began to want more out of life but your friend or friends are content staying right where they are. That’s a crucial time when you have to make a choice. Sometimes this process can be uncomfortable, but absolutely necessary.  You have to choose to remain the same or have the courage to change.

When you’ve grown up with someone and been through ups and downs together, it can be difficult to move on to new things and let go of what you’re used to. It can be like a tug of war, with the back and forth of associating less with the old relationships and moving forward to new ones. I can say, that it’s so freeing to be on a journey of growth and have someone in your corner that understands you instead of someone who tries to keep you from moving forward and growing.

As painful as it may be many times it’s inevitable, because you may risk becoming stagnant if you continue in a close with this person or persons. There is a saying that I’ve heard many times which says “either you will affect them or they will infect you”. Though they may be long time friends is the friendship worth your growth and possibly your success? Sometimes when you make the choice of moving on, you may actually do your friends a favor and they may decide to eventuality begin on the journey of growth as well. Even if they don’t that’s ok in order to gain something new sometimes you must let go of the old. As difficult as it may be, make the necessary decision and move forward to your success. You have in you!

As Always Remember You Are A Worthy Woman!

It’s Ok To Ask For Help

It’s ok to ask for help! One the road to becoming the women of God that we were created to be, we have to learn to ask for help.

It’s so easy to just do everything yourself, and continue trying to be superwoman. I realized just recently that superwoman doesn’t really exist. If she does behind closed doors is, she struggling in secret? I know for me for years I felt that if I asked for help that people would think that I didn’t have it all together. What a relief it was when I let go of that thought process, and learned that sometimes in order to get it together help is required. Even if there are a few who may think you don’t have it all together, that’s ok. Hold your head high and ask for help anyway. At some point in life we have to look beyond what others think and do what’s best for us.

When you ask for help it not only alleviates some pressure but many times it also allows you to gain new knowledge that you wouldn’t have otherwise gained had you continued to do it on your own. It’s like being in a brainstorming session and you have an idea but those you are brainstorming with come up with ideas that you never thought of and you are able to take your original idea even further than you expected. Had that brainstorming session not happened you would still be there at point A trying to figure out the best way to bring the idea to fruition. It’s just the same with asking for help, if you ask you may gain wisdom that can take your life to the next level. Continue reading It’s Ok To Ask For Help

The Courage to Change

Just because that’s the way it’s always been doesn’t mean that’s the way it should always be! It’s such a blessing to be able to choose. But what do you do when you allow comfort and fear to keep you from choosing? I guess it’s not that you aren’t choosing because you are. Choosing not to choose is also a choice. There may be times when it feels like the situation you’re in is your only option, but there’s more than likely always another option you just may not see it at the time or maybe you just don’t want to rock the boat and deal with the possible friction that may come with change.

Sometimes it’s worth it to endure the consequences or the friction of change in order to have better and do better in life. It does take courage to change but it also costs us at times when we don’t have the courage to change.

Often times is comfortable to stay where you are doing what you are used to but it may not always be the best option. I mean for example if you go to a job everyday that you know is sucking the life out of you, but because it’s comfortable and a little flexible you stay. What would happen if you took the leap of faith and applied for jobs that not only brought you to your skill level but also poured life into you. Would it be worth it? Anytime we change it will always be a gamble, but anytime we choose to remain the same we are at risk of stagnation.

So let me ask you what is it in your life that you need to muster up the courage to change? Is it the courage to find a new job, end that relationship that you know is not good for you or even move to a better neighborhood. Whatever it is I’m sure it’s worth the courage to change, and if the change you make is not a desirable one keep looking until you find what you’re looking for. Sometimes we have to make several adjustments before finding the right fit, but it’s usually worth it.

Why not step out on faith today and have the courage to change, this may be the best decision you make in your life. You will never know unless you try. I remember specifically I had to muster up the courage to find a school for my son and the thought of having to make that decision was scary but necessary. It took me a while but I finally did it and boy am I glad I did. I know it’s difficult because you don’t know what the outcome is going to be but let go of the fear and step out on faith, it just may be the best decision of your life. You have it the courage in you to change.

As always remember You Are a Worthy Woman!

Not Why Can’t You, But How Can You

Ever have an idea to do something and your first thought after that great idea is why you can’t carry out that idea? I know I’ve been there, more times than I’d like to admit. But I have learned that when my mind shifts to the negative, I have to steer it back in a positive direction. It’s difficult for dreams to be birthed in negativity, so I propose a solution. The next time you have an idea that you’d like to execute on and that negative thought tries to slow you down. Simply say to yourself “not why can’t I, but how can I.

I truly believe dwelling on how you can instead of the reasons why you can’t can be life changing. Just think of all the things you could accomplish if you executed on how could you instead of why you couldn’t. If instead of why you can’t start a business you created a plan of how you can. If instead of constantly saying why no one would buy your products you come up with a plan for them not only to buy your products but to also help promote your products. It also really helps to associate yourself with people who think outside of the box and look for the possibilities in a situation instead of the impossibilities. That one change alone will have you executing on way more ideas than giving yourself an out as you may have done in the past.

I challenged someone to do this a few days ago to try this strategy out and see how much they accomplish. I am anxious to see out it turns out! So I would like to challenge you as well. For the next 30 days every time you have an idea that you’d like to execute on and that negative thought tries to shut down the idea before it ever gets started. Ask yourself the question, “Not why can’t I, how can I”? But let’s take it a step further, don’t just think about it, I want you to get out a notebook or a piece of paper and write down a few steps you can take to execute on this idea. I am looking forward to seeing a lot of ideas that would have normally been dismissed to being executed on, and not just executed but executed with confidence. Leave a comment below letting me know what ideas you are executing on. Ready, set, go!!

As always Remember You Are A Worthy Woman!!

Nobody Better

I love watching movies and finding meaning or quotes in the movie that help with life. There is a Whoopi Goldberg movie that I watched years ago called “Corina Corina”. In that movie one of the actors made a statement and even years later that statement resonates with me. “I am Molly Singer and there is nobody in the world that is better than me” is the statement she made. The statement wasn’t said in a cocky or superior kind of way but simply in a bold and confident kind of way.

That statement says so much in my opinion. I hear it saying even when others don’t think I’m good, I am. Even when I don’t feel like the best, I am. Even when I don’t feel the prettiest, I am. I am confident and I am bold.

If you just took a moment and looked at yourself in the mirror and said I am (insert your name here) and there is no one in the world that is better than me. Making a statement like that exudes confidence immediately. I don’t mean just mumble the statement, but say it like you mean it. Even if you don’t feel like the statement is true at the moment, that’s ok say it anyway. If you say it enough you will begin to believe it.

It’s interesting how we sometimes believe a lie quicker than we believe the truth. I know I may not know you personally and may have never met you, but the truth is, you’re beautiful. No matter what the world says or your teacher said or what even what you say to yourself negatively, you are beautiful and you are worthy ! I want you to always remember that. Even at times when your mind or the enemy is telling you different don’t believe it. I am absolutely positively sure you are beautiful and worthy. No matter what you’ve done or been through those things don’t define who you are.

Let’s begin today by leaving the past in the past and using those obstacles and adversities to make us better not bring us further down. There is a quote which I’m not sure who the author is, that says “repair your broken principles and keep moving forward”. That is my advice for you today, repair or come out of who and what you used to be and come up higher to walk into who God called you to be. No longer driven by your past, but boldly and confidently walking into your future.

You are (insert your name here) and there is no one in the world that is better than you!

Always Remember You Are A Worthy Woman!

Take Time To Care For You

As women we are naturally wired to take care of everyone, but at what point do we take care of ourselves? If you are a woman reading this and you are constantly taking care of others but never take the time for you, it’s time to change that today. When caring for others whether children, husband, parents or even friends you can easily forget to take care of you. Caring for self is very important and needs to be prioritized as such. As I write this I am also speaking to myself.

Whether you just take a few hours of alone time to read a good book, going to lunch with a friend or treating yourself to a massage. Self care is so important in that when we are always taking care of others and never or rarely taking care of ourselves, and it can lead to burnout at times. We can’t very well take care of others if we are out of commission. As is stated in the announcements on a plane before take off, In the event of an emergency situation and passengers are required to put on the masks, you must first put the mask on yourself before you can help anyone else. The same goes for life.

When I say self care I’m not just talking about treating yourself to “me time” by doing something you love. I’m also speaking in terms of health as well. If there is a doctors appointment that you have been putting off or if you haven’t been to the dentist in a while even, this is definitely a part of self care. Another important form of self care is the proper food intake. Eating too many sugary, fried and processed food zaps your energy which leaves you drained while trying to care for your family and friends. You already have a lot on your plate who wants to be exhausted halfway through the day. I’m sure each of us women have neglected to care for ourselves in at least one if not all of the self care categories that I wrote about in this post.

Let’s get intentional on taking the time to care for ourselves,and I don’t mean just saying we are going to do it. Set up a time(yes like an appointment) when you are going to enjoy some “me time”, make that doctor or dentist appointment and or even meal plan to start eating healthy. We are diligent in making appointments and caring for others let’s get diligent in making appointments and caring for ourselves. Let’s get started today! Your family and friends will thank you!

As always remember You Are A Worthy Woman!

Overcoming The Unexpected

Have you ever just been going about your life doing well, grinding on the way to success and out of the blue it hit you? What hit you? Life that’s what hit you! You know that bill, bad news or unexpected breakdown of a relationship you weren’t prepared for? What do you do to overcome moments or even seasons like these? Well this past week I experienced one of those unexpected moments and it wasn’t pretty. I want to share some points with you that may help in coming out of these seasons or moments of life on top.

1. Faith
The first thing I think is crucial in seasons or moments like this is faith. At times like these you you should draw as close to God as possible. He is the ultimate comforter. Some of the ways you can draw close to God is: reading His word, praying(talk to Him just like you talk to your friends, He understands your language He made you), listening to sermons and one of my favorites, listening to praise and worship music. In my opinion faith is absolutely necessary in overcoming life’s’ unexpected moments or seasons.

2. Good Friends
There is nothing like having a good friend to give you that pep talk, laugh and cry all in the same conversation. That friend who will allow you to be sad for a few moments and even a few days if need be, but after that, is there to motivate you to get back in the swing of things. At times like these we don’t need those fair weather friends or someone who calls themselves your friend but aren’t really familiar with the true meaning of the word. You need those true friends that will push you. This brings me to my next point.

3. A Positive Environment
Being positive when going through life’s unexpected moments can be hard, but it will make all the difference in the time it takes you to bounce back. Inevitably at some point in our lives we will all be knocked down but we must not stay down, we have to get back up as quickly as possible. To do that maintaining a positive environment is key. You do this by surrounding yourself with positive people even if it’s only one person be sure that person is positive. If you don’t have any positive people to be around then listen to positive people’s messages on your phone, in your car and on the computer. Some positive people you can listen to are Dr. Eric Thomas, Zig Ziglar and Les Brown to name a few. Each one of these guys motivate me each time I listen to them but if you aren’t motivated by any of them you can do a google search to find someone that motivates you. Being positive also includes the words you speak to yourself, this is crucial in this process of overcoming the unexpected. It’s bad when others speak negative words about you, but I think it’s even worse when you speak negative about yourself. Speaking positive in my opinion helps you stay positive.

4. Laughter
Lastly when going through the unexpected, I suggest you get in a few belly laughs a day. Really you should get a few belly laughs in even if you aren’t facing a challenge. For me I have a few go to movies or tv shows that I watch when I just need a laugh. Laughing just does something for me, it almost has a soothing affect. I remember as a kid hearing women say that they had to laugh to keep from crying. Sometimes that’s what we have to do, laugh to keep from crying. Laughter is healing for the emotions in my opinion. As the scripture says “Laughter does the heart good like medicine”. So the next time you are going through or just need a laugh get a few funny movies and laugh to your hearts content.

So if you’re in a difficult unexpected season or moment right now, try some of these keys and see how they help during this time. If life is going good for you keep this post handy anyway to refer back to as life has a way of showing up unexpectedly. Actually it may be helpful to have these things in place at all times because as Dr. Eric Thomas says “If you stay ready, you don’t have to get ready”. No matter what season of life you may be in today always remember You Are A Worthy Woman!

True Love is Worth the Wait

Over the past few weeks I have talked about the ultimate example of love, the love of God the father. Though His love is irreplaceable, as humans we seek earthly(human love) as well. In seeking earthly(human love) at what cost should you do so? I mean in this day and age there are several ways in which people seek love. Whether it be blind dates, meeting people while in your daily routine, attending singles events or online dating. The options seem to continue to grow. While in this process of finding love or love finding you, make sure that’s it just that, love. Not filling the need to not be lonely or the deadline that you had for yourself to be married by a certain age.

I had a conversation some time ago with someone and we were talking about relationships and how they were tired of being alone. The conversation got very interesting when I asked the question “is it worth it to just date someone for the sake of not being alone and ultimately feeling a false sense of love”? I mean of course no one can ever come close to God’s but that love definitely doesn’t have to be second rate. From the way the conversation went the answer came to that it wasn’t worth it just to date or marry just for the sake of dating or marrying, but being lonely wasn’t fun either.

There comes a time when the decisions that we make will be the best decision for us, but it may be a little uncomfortable for a while. Finding love almost always falls in this category. I mean we are faced with the dilemma of accepting what is available or holding out for true love. The pain and loneliness that comes with the decision of waiting for a man who genuinely loves you and will treat you the way you ought to be treated will be nothing compared to the joy of when he actually arrives. Of course when you are wanting for something you tend to focus on getting that thing, but as the saying goes, don’t be so focused on the destination that you forget to enjoy the journey.

If you find yourself single and wondering when will my time come, be patient your time is coming!! True love is worth the wait. Though at times being single you may experience heartache. I’m sure that wouldn’t compare to the pain and regret of realizing that you gave up what you wanted most for what you desired at the time. So just be patient, as I said before your time is coming! While you’re waiting prepare, because preparation time is never lost time. True love is worth the wait!

Always remember You are a Worthy Woman!